To the Victor Go the Spoils!

A new S430 Mercedes Sedan. A dashing smile. A buff body. Followed around by female groupies. But enough about Sjt. Schnell--let's talk about the election!

On November 2, 2004, following a vicious campaign waged by Sjt. Hearey and Judge Susan Jaros that was characterized by excessive charges, counter-charges, and surcharges, Sjt. Hearey was elected Judge of the Court of Nisi Prius. "Things are going to be different around here," proclaimed the new judge. "We'll have Saturday sessions at the Hermit Club! We'll have special sessions for St. Patrick's Day and the incoming Neophytes! I'm appointing a clerk, a master of the rolls and a bailiff!" Sjt. McKay (Minor), quoting (he said) Aristotle, was hear to mutter, "Meet the new boss, same as the old boss."

Let the games--er, the 105th Year of the Court--begin!